wow...i'm sorry

So the reason there's a huge gap between the last post and this one is very simply this:

I forgot about this.

Not only were my excuses in my last post main contributors to why I forgot, but I also never xed out of any internet windows from then til now, and this is my homepage to help me remember to do it. I really love doing it, but blogging isn't on my top priorities yet. Maybe if I get some followers I'll be better at it......*hint hint*

So this is my apology post.

Band season is coming to a end in 3 weeks and then I'll be done for ever. How sad. Senior year really has been getting to me. I'm one of those people who get attached to something that has been around for forever. When my parents wanted to move about half a year ago, I actually broke down and cried right there at the thought of leaving my house and my school and friends and all the memories I made. At how hard it would be to go to a new school during my senior year. Especially because they wanted to leave Jersey and move to Vermont or New Hampshire. I don't think there's anything wrong with those states, but its so foreign to me that the idea of leaving my childhood behind scares me. To an extreme, I want my parents to live here forever so I can come back and show my kids eventually the house I grew up in and the room I spent so much time in. The idea always bothers me that it's not going to always be here. That's why going off to college next year freaks me out. Not because it's the start of something new, but that I have to leave my sense of security behind. I feel like it hurts me more to say goodbye to something that kept me safe and I had great memories with than it does for anyone else.

I don't think this applies to people or relationships though. Sure it hurts to say goodbye to someone, but I've never had a problem with telling people I was friends with or guys I had chemistry with to piss off, even if I really enjoyed their company while it was going on.

But anyway, I'm getting off track...by a lot. The main thing I'm trying to say is that I'm going to miss band, but I'm glad it's over. There are some people in the group that I wish I never met, but others I will remember for the rest of my life. This year has been different because I'm up there on the top of the food chain, and practically everyone talks to me, which makes me feel like I really belong to a family...(except for about 10 people who ruin it. But there's a grand total of like 145 people in my high school marching band, so that's not too much of a problem) And once band season is over, I'll have quite a bit more of free time, which is when I'll blog more. Who knows. Maybe for christmas I'll get a camera and can turn these blogs into vlogs! Oh that would be fun!

Anyway, that's it in this post. I'm going to post another entry right after this because it's of a completely different nature and I felt it didn't belong in this post.

Ok... um....yeah....